Advancing in the 6 CORE Leadership Skills – Skill 4: Building Genuine Rapport With Others
The skill of Building Genuine Rapport With Others is the heart of the Compassion CORE Leadership Quality in action. It is neither soft nor performative, but deeply personal and real. Strong leaders understand this and build relational capital with intention and consistency, knowing it is the foundation of trust and long-term impact.
Why It Matters
Trust is not built in the big moments. It is built in the small ones: the quick check-in, the unexpected “How’s your family doing?”, the pause to listen instead of rushing to solve. Genuine rapport is not about friendship but about creating connections where people feel seen, not only as employees but as human beings.
When rapport is missing, collaboration slows, feedback lands poorly, and psychological safety begins to erode. When it is present, people are more willing to take risks, share ideas, and go the extra mile, not because they have to, but because they genuinely want to.
How to Strengthen This Skill
Start one-on-ones with curiosity, not urgency: Ask how their week has been rather than jumping right into work discussions.
Listen between the lines: What energizes them? What drains them? What do they not say?
Use the 4C One-on-One structure:
o Connect – Start with the person, not the task. Open with a moment of genuine connection.
o Check In – Review key updates and surface blockers. Get tactical.
o Coach/Consult – Support their thinking, not just their doing. This is the heart of the conversation.
o Close – Align on next steps and reinforce ownership.
Create a “People File” (yes, a real doc): Note goals, motivators, coaching preferences, birthdays, and “need-to-knows”.
Ask preference-based questions: Focus on asking about motivations, feedback, and support.
Share your own story (appropriately): Let them see the human behind the title.
KEY TAKEAWAYS:
Maintaining trust with your team requires deliberate, consistent effort to build rapport with every individual.
What is one thing you can share about yourself that can help your team see you as human and not just their leader?
In an upcoming one-on-one meeting, try asking questions and listening more to learn about that person’s preferences, motivators, personal goals, etc.
In an upcoming one-on-one meeting, provide a frame, reflection, or challenge that actually helps that person grow, not just complete tasks.
Try ending one-on-ones with a note of belief or encouragement and see how that transforms someone’s perspective and engagement.
